Because then, I could feel only hatred. He drew a nipple into his mouth, and a rush of fire swept to the empty pressure between my legs. I tried to push him away, but he grabbed my wrists, pressed them to the mattress on either side of me, and shackled them there in an iron grip. He moved to the other breast and scraped the taut peak with teeth before sucking. I bit my cheek to hold in the moan that wanted to escape. His head moved lower, the wet heat of his tongue dipping inside my navel. My body tightened like a bow string when he pressed his face between my thighs and inhaled. His warm breath brushed my clit, and a fever unfolded inside, liquefying the tension in my muscles like melted butter. “Kotyonok,” he said, the low rumble of his voice making my entire sex throb. “I bet you taste as sweet as you smell.” I never thought this would be his intention when he won. Fisting the comforter on either side of me, I fought the urge to lift my hips toward the wetness and heat. This was just another way for him to humiliate me; to pull my body to his will while my mind still despised him. Begging and fighting hadn’t stopped him, and as panic whirled within, my mouth spat out the first words it grasped onto. “What kind of sadist are you? You consider this torture?” He placed an open-mouthed kiss on my inner thigh, and I heard a slight smile in his voice. “I don’t feel like torturing you right now. I feel like seeing how fast I can make you come with my mouth.” He was obviously confident he could do it fast, and I hated knowing, even now, he probably could. My body didn’t seem to have forgotten he gave it pleasure and food; how he evoked a desperate want inside of me that finally made me feel alive. It still grabbed on tight, unwilling to let go. Shame expanded in my chest and burned the backs of my eyes. I hated him. He’d degraded me. Used me. Ripped out my heart. And when he got what he wanted—my papa’s head—he’d throw me out with the trash. Tears running down my cheeks, I went somewhere faraway. Somewhere desolate and numb. He must have felt the sudden surrender in my body before he put his mouth on me because his eyes lifted to my face. He watched me for a long, suffocating moment, and then he pulled away from me.