closed his teeth on my thumb. I pulled it free, drew it across the scar on his lip, and was compelled to softly say, “So much more than that. . .” My chest felt so heavy and light all at once. Then the thick silence was interrupted by a knock on the door. Naked as the day I was born, I cast a gaze to the sound just as Ronan said, “Come in.” With a panicked noise, I scrambled off the bed and ran to the bathroom at lightspeed, Ronan’s soft chuckle following me. He wouldn’t think it was so funny if Yulia caught me in here fornicating with the master, killed me by sticking a pin in the heart of a voodoo doll, and destroyed his best chance at revenge. I slammed the bathroom door shut behind me and rested my back against it. I had no idea what I was doing with Ronan, but I did know something about it felt right. Of course, my mind reminded me of the many reasons I shouldn’t fool around with D’yavol, including but not limited to: v He abducted me. Y He planned to murder my papa in cold blood. v He threw me out to sleep with the dogs just last night. My conscience was raining on my parade. Feeling so conflicted it ate at me, I dragged myself to the shower, turned the faucet on hot, and stepped under the spray. As the water rained down on me, I thought of so much but seemingly nothing at all. If anything, after this experience, I knew with a certainty I would never marry Carter. A passionless marriage wasn’t in my future, and with that knowledge, a weight was lifted from my shoulders. But it didn’t diminish other heavy truths. Even considering my papa’s lies, his criminal character, and his absences, I still found it impossible to imagine a life without him. He was my family, my father, the person I’d always looked to for the answers. And when he turned himself in for me, he would no longer exist. The thought constricted my chest so tightly I was sure I’d bruise. Selfishly, I was just as terrified of being alone. I didn’t know how Ivan felt about me anymore, and I knew I couldn’t ask him to stay by my side just because I was scared of being truly, awfully alone ... Madame Richie’s cigarette smoke and laughter swirled behind my closed eyes, clouding my mind with the smell of cloves and ruin. I wasn’t sure if it was the shower water or tears running down my face when an arm wrapped around my